The notion of Teenagers being trouble-makers has survived generations because it is utterly relatable & the immediacy of the impact leads to a certain behavioral response from the adults as well. In brief, the mainstream believes that an irritated teenager calls for an irritated parent!
This is a highly flawed concept as it creates tremendous gaps between parents & children. More often than not, parents are left unaware of their own turbulent teenage times & do not ponder upon the relatability of this situation because- We all were Teenagers once! The teenage phase is one of the most impulsive & transient times of our lives. A lot is changing & there is a huge stack up on the confusion front.
To best deal with this situation, it is important that adults inculcate patience and acknowledge the trouble that teenagehood puts an individual through.
Emotional Support is a must when dealing with a teenager. Teenagers are prone to be more temperamental and it is almost non-voluntary in nature, the manifestations are different in different teenagers. This depends largely on the kind of environment the teenager is growing in.
Here, we talk about how you can inculcate an attitude that supports your teenager and helps build your relationship based upon trust.
5 empathetic ways to adequately support your Teenager
Empathy is very important nourishment in teenage years. The behavior that we grow up around defines us as adults. Therefore, it is very important that teens are exposed to kindness & patience.
Listen to your Teen
During the turbulent years of Puberty, teens go through various spirals of change- both physical & mental. In this process, they suddenly get acquainted with a swarm of emotional experiences. Most of these changes are confusing, the system suddenly is led by hormones & the best of us are unable to cope with that o a daily basis.
In such a phase of life, which is very crucial for their future & personality development a caregiver should play the role of a confidant- a safe space that carries no judgment.
Understand to be Understood
Teenagers are often unaware of their own doing & behavior. They do not get emotional or are impulsive because they mean trouble, it is only natural that they are so. It is that time of life when you grow at an incredible rate & are exposed to the variety that adulthood contains. This time is exciting & adventurous and must be laden with comfort and honesty.
Many times we as caregivers forget to communicate the situation with honesty, don't assume that your teenager will not understand. Remember communication is the key.
Allow Ample Time to your Teenager
Don’t let anger & annoyance get the better of you. As a caregiver, it is important to deal with demanding teen situations with patience, trust, and warmth. If you feel that some time will do you both good or some time off will help your teen cope up with the immensity of emotions that they are feeling, then make space for that.
A little more time can do wonders for your relationship & it'll help your child feel supported and validated, it will make them see that you care and you understand that it's difficult for them right now.
Make Emotional Support available to your Teen
C’mon appreciate your child! Acknowledge their achievements & praise them a little. Give them the required push of that parental motivation, that which helps a child find purpose in the good stuff that they do. It builds character, it helps them trust you more & makes them feel like they belong.
Be a Friend. Not an Administrator.
Well, duh! Nobody wants a supervisor at their home. As your child is growing, it is important that you treat them as adults and give their opinions respect. Negating and dismissing your teens’ conversations about themselves or not listening to them often creates a gap between parents and children. This can be extremely difficult for both of you. Treat the situation with the respect it deserves, provide space, respect opinions & value their insights- treat them like you would treat your friend (well, with boundaries of course!)
It is not really difficult if you inculcate the habit of asking why is my child behaving the way they are, or observe their behavioral changes if you try. So, why don't you try and tell us how that goes.